You’re the person I think about first, when I wake up.

You’re the person I think about when something small happens.

You’re the person I think about, and yearn to talk to, when something important happens.

It’s you; the person I dream of, imagine, and think of sharing my life with.

You’re the person I talk about, talk to, think about, and think of.

You’re the person, whose day I wonder about.

You’re the person whose happiness I consider; health I worry about, and life I want to be part of.

 

You’re my best friend, the person I call, the person I think of, the person I share my life with.
You’re the person I’m in love with.
The person I want to share my future life with, big things, and small things.

You’re the person I’ve tried to work my life around.

You’re the person I need, the person I want.

And today I found myself without you;

for the first time I need my best friend and today

you’re not going to be here for me, and help me over the hurt I feel

because I’m heartbroken over you;

how do I cope with losing my love, and my best friend, all in one blow?

So In Love.

How have I been so stupid?

How have I missed, that I am utterly in love with you?

And the only thing holding me back, is the fear that you won’t love me enough to make me happy, to give me the life that I want, but to also be the person I want, someone to love me enough to stretch far and wide, and to move mountains, for me, because you love me,

like I love you; like I would move mountains for you, and do more than that which is within my power, to make you happy; because I am crazy, foolishly in love with you.

For you; N

It feels a little impossible
for someone to sweep into your life
where, a day before
they had not existed…

Turn your days upside down
your original thoughts of the week
the year,
what your dreams are
what you dream of

All topsy turvy
nothing makes sense

And then it’s all gone
and he’s gone
as if it never happened

Only from the memories
and the few I told
do I know; it really happened

And if I’m in doubt of that
there’s the gaping loss in my heart
because without a thought
no calculated meaning
I fell in love.

And people talk of this,
beautiful love
which I dreamed of
this, boundless, endless love
not entirely forgiving
notwithstanding criticism
not rose-coloured,
but openly honest
love.

Love for the way we are together
for the way we make each other feel
for the moments, for the spark
for the support and connection
for the passion
all without intention;
love fell upon me.

Left, loving you.

I love you
in my own special way;
I love you unlike any other,
you make me smile
and you fill me whole
deeply, from the depths within

I adore you
unlike any other I know,
you make my day
a happier time; with smiles
I’d otherwise leave unknown

I’ll always love you
in ways you won’t notice,
when I can, I’ll cherish our moments
in case I’m left with nothing left
except these memories
otherwise insufficient…
yet preciously special
to me.

I love you
there’s no way I can disguise it
exhausting to hide it
painful to feel it;
but I love you
and I wished you loved me too.

Tumbling Down

Heart in my throat,
struggling to breathe
flutters in my stomach
tension in my hands
burning in my soul.

Arms raised high above my head
leaping off the edge
falling, windswept hair
tumbling, revolving, through the air
I am falling.

Catch me, catch me if you can
as I burst through the air
arms outstretched,
hoping to get caught in your
strong warm arms.

A little

I’m a little in love
with you;
as the silence descends
I think of you.

Together as we were
moments of perfection,
when I wished time
would stop,
so I could be in your arms
a little longer.

Holding onto you.

I think I’ll wait here
a little longer,
and wrap my arms around
myself;
holding onto hope
that you’ll pick me up
and hold me close
and never let me go.

Beginning

It’s beginning, entry titles
it’s tingling, the sensation
it’s trembling, the earth is shifting
we’re moving; the world
uplifting my roots
buried deep within.

I sense the danger zone,
flying high above the clouds
rocking my inner stability
you’ve shaken me,
from my boots, to my head;
left dazed and surprised.

You’ve caught me unaware,
my guard is down,
bravado’s disappeared
and I’m left here
boots in tact,
waiting for you to capture me
slowly, beautifully
until there’s nobody left
but you, in my deep blue eyes.

 

It’s like the rising tide,
creeping up on you
until it’s high above your head
and there’s nothing left to do
but kick hard, and kick strong.

But I’m failing at holding it back
the cold dark waters creeping upon me,
my pride begs me not to call for you
cry out your name, and plead;
drag me home, steal me away
wrap me in the warm blankets
of your loving arms.

This swell is mighty,
the depths are deeper than I know,
my gut is screaming,
heart plunging further to the ground
heavy and slow, I realise too late;
I’ve fallen, tumbled, head first
in love with you.

Whirling

As the stars twinkle
the birds settle for the night,
while the storm gently rattles my old
fashioned window panes;
still I lie here,
silent as the dark night,
while you dance through my mind
over, and over and over again.

I watch as you grasp my hand
touch my cheek,
caress my lips with your own
whisper in my ear
hug me close.

You’re whirling through my head
over, and over and over,
I can’t close my eyes for peace
you’re there; stronger than ever.
I can’t cast you away
you follow me, into the depths
of my restless dreams.

I can’t breathe, for
thoughts get stuck in my throat
words I was afraid to utter,
feelings I was too cowardly to share
trap me, holding me down;
it’s getting too much.

Every dream I had,
the many desires I held down
struggled with my longing
and let it simmer beneath the surface
my smiles, my jokes, a façade;
protecting myself
from these reckless, wild desires
I have for you.

I can’t breathe, can’t think
it’s bubbling beneath the surface
and slowly I’m falling apart
wishing for it to be under your touch;
as you take me with you
over beautifully magic hills
to the heavens and beyond.

I’ve written thousands of words,
marked these pages,
wept over the ink flowing from my pen,
poured my heart out,
all for you.

Yet you’ve moved on,
your heart captured by another
left me standing still in time,
longing for you, as the day I first met you
and basked in your warm eyes.

Denied all the feelings I had for you
until it was too late,
and time had passed on by,
as they say,
ships crossing in the night,
I missed your loving embrace
and it’s all my fault

My stubbornness,
my fearful heart, and terrified body
scared to love,
fearing the end;
scared you’ll leave
like all others did.

I am trying, best that I can,
yet it’s too late,
you’ve gone;
anchors up, you’ve left the shore,
standing tall, I wave goodbye
with a soft sad smile upon my lips;
I’ll love you still,
the best way I know,
always.