Take Me Away

It’s coming;
the day looming
an impending date in the calendar;
days pass, although nights linger
I wake with anticipation
struggle though the days
longing for relief
of a nights sleep, which fails to arrive.

I’m left wanting;
with each day
an impending desire,
it’s building,
it’s burning, it’s roaring
as the days pass,
I struggle to battle it;
knowing it’ll consume me.

It’s looming,
it’s coming, calling me in
pulling me backwards,
I’m sinking slowly, going within,
the dark depths of my soul
they’re creeping back,
I’m struggling to crawl
fighting the tide,
battling for more.

I’m wrestling with myself,
clawing back every ounce of energy
struggling to fight the devil within,
reaching for the light I see
scrambling for your hands
as the lights I see in your eyes
they’re pulling me in,
I’m floundering,
left longing…
for your capable arms,
to drag me back again,
lift me up, and take me whole,
sweep me off my feet

please,
just take me away;
let me forget tomorrow
abandon the remaining week,
fail to remember the darkness looming,
hold me tightly,
smother me in your arms;
make me safe, make me whole,
give me strength
to fight alone.

Give me courage,
surrender yourself,
hold me close
and ask for no more.

Camouflage

If these words leave my head
and permanently ink the page I write upon
I fear my descent
the pulling tide,
the enormous waves
which sweep my feet further off the ground
till only tip toes, touch the sand

Darkness mixed within light
drags me down,
it pulls me under;
I struggle to the surface,
dazed and confused,
this bodily compass is lost,
I am lost

Yet here I am, found
and safe;
my body lies in this childhood bed
the same as yesterday;
yet I am nothing, nothing like yesterday
my skin is changed;
heart altered, mind and body
separated.

I am torn, from the depths
to the surface;
I am a chameleon,
camouflaging myself, to protect
the disarray within.

My mind is like a movie,
replaying the moment, again
over and over again
I’m scared I’ll wear it out
forget fragments,
and turn it from a colourful memory
to a faded, near black and white movie
almost as if it were someone else

Someone else who danced with you,
locked eyes with yours, and
smiled with the greatest desire
buried deep in these soulful eyes,
whose body would hug your own
throughout each dance move
hands all over,
switching grips and clasping again
squeezing, and longing to hold on longer

As we danced, I smiled,
I smiled from the tips of my toes,
to my deep blue eyes;
I saw myself in your eyes
with beautiful desire,
hopefulness, and something more…

We danced, and we loved
we cherrished, and we caressed
our bodies embraced
and the memories of the words you spoke
the fleeting, heartfelt compliments
and burning desire;
left me renewed
longing for more.

Wildfire Desire

We’re dancing around one another
grazing hands, skimming touches
fleeting smiles,
longing looks, hidden by half closed eyelashes,
slow, steady gazes
deep sighs, rippling through our bodies
fluttering heartbeats
excitement burns deep

Teasing, playful conversations
with wistful glances
a burning desire for a caress
temptation, laced with uncertainty
desire plays like wildfire
toying with these strings;
hoping you’ll take the plunge
and capture these lips,
embrace this body with your own
whisking away all uncertainty
marking this body, with butterfly kisses,
loving this soul, with every piece of kindness you possess,
devouring every moment,
as if it were a dream;
holding on tightly, for just one moment longer,
just… because you want to.

Trust

The shadows pulled me in,
swept me away,
swallowed me whole;
fragile but fighting
I stood tall
defied the odds,
and built myself up.

With courage, I opened my heart
slowly your warmness dragged me back
from the shadows that pulled me in,
your voice brought me closer
nearer to the clearing;
your steadiness gave me strength,
your heart gave me trust.

My frozen, fearful heart
warmed to you
it started to feel for you
learned to want you
began to dream of more
learning to trust
once more.

With a loss for words
I ask for your trust
your patience, and your warmth
help me thaw,
build a fire in my soul;
but give me time,
and trust me,
give me your heart,
and I’ll give you mine.

Teddy Bear

As I sit here, across from you
with just a table between us two
and I listen to you intently retell a tale
I wonder in my own mind,
if you are as gentle as your eyes seem
if you are as soft as melting butter
whether you will wrap me safely in your arms
tonight
like a gigantic teddy bear,
or leave me to walk home
cold and shivering,
longing for more.

 

 

My breath catches
I am still, like the night air
my body tense, in anticipation
your cool fingers slip silently upwards
roaming slowly beneath my warm layers
I shiver from your cool touch
whilst only feeling the heat
of your trailing fingers
as you caress my body

There’s just us two
in a room full of 16
our bodies feel warm
when we stand close together
eyes never leaving the others
except to laugh and shyly smile

There’s just us two
for tonight it’s just me and you
we can laugh through the night
and touch each other
giggle and flirt and blame the wine
our hands linger on one another
we touch for no reason
and I feel warm and wanted

But it’s just tonight
before the clock strikes 12
and we chastly kiss goodbye
left to only hold our memories
and some unsaid wish
for more.

My heart is weary
for what is lost to you and I
it weeps for an opportunity
when we danced so close
with chaste kisses
and promises for tomorrow

A swift front rolled in
and swept me away
to the devils doors
he pulled me in and
took what he pleased
and now I’m broken in two.

Your warm, soft hands hold me gently
with care so deeply set in your eyes,
you hold me softly and sooth my wounds
I feel safe in your hands
and sad for what we lost
what we could have had together
that someone else now has
and the most you can do
is hold my hand for a brief moment
under the privacy of the table
whispering in my ear
of what we lost
because the devil rode in
and left me broken.

I’ve got this silly smile
it’s tickling at my lips
I try to quieten it
compress my lips
behave.

But I’ve got this bubble inside
and my lips are my weakness
they’re creeping into a smile
a silly, school-girl smile
that’s bursting to beam
from side to side.

My lips, they’re twitching
a tickling, school-girl smile
itching to come out
because today,
you teased me, and like
that silly school-girl
I just wanted more.